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July-August Quick Reviews

Happy Saturday good people. Here’s the last of my 2013 summer movie snippet reviews. Some of these are still in theaters and others will be in Redbox soon so I suggest you all check them out!


Despicable Me 2

The first film provided us with a pleasantly fresh tale of a villain with a soft side. This time around, Gru and his sometimes annoying, but most of the time hilarious minions are fully engulfed in the world of fatherhood. While the romance aspect of the film does seem a tad forced and Kristen Wiig’s character is a bit too cartoony even for this, this sequel manages to provide us with the same heart that made the original a classic; mainly through another memorable antagonist and those freakishly adorable children.  FINAL GRADE: A-

Pacific Rim

Certain summer movies are what they are and don’t make any apologies about it. They don’t make any effort to do more than what is advertised. Guillermo Del Toro’s action flick about man made robots fighting inter-dimensional monsters is just what you’d expect. And that is why it works. It’s adult Power Rangers meets Godzilla and it’s just plain fun. Don’t worry about the stock characters or the cheesy dialogue. Just enjoy explosions, special effects, and Idris Elba being a bad ass. Isn’t that what the summer is all about? FINAL GRADE: B

The Wolverine

Can we just pretend like Wolverine’s last on-screen outing never happened? What? We can? This movie is set after X-Men 3 and isn’t a sequel to that 2009 travesty? Ok, cool! This time around, Hugh Jackman’s renegade mutant finds himself in Japan where he gets wrapped up in a plot made fit for the classic Japanese films of old. The movie often can’t decide whether it wants to be a sci-fi movie or a classic noir samurai flick, but in the end, it does what it’s supposed to do; Provide us with awesome blade on blade fight scenes and, more importantly, get us excited for X-Men: Days of Future Past in May 2014!!!. FINAL GRADE: B


Seeing as how I’m the only person who seemingly wasn’t blown away by District 9 (Neill Blomkamp’s previous film) I feel as though I am well equipped to provide an unbiased and fare assessment of this go-round. While certain moments remind you of every other sci-fi movie ever made and Jodie Foster just seems irritating for two hours, the story is a compelling one and the action is top notch. Sharlto Copley is especially mesmerizing as Matt Damon’s primary adversary.  FINAL GRADE: B

2 Guns

Remember what I said about buddy cop movies? You don’t? *Sigh* Go read my June Reviews and come back… ok, done? Here, the leads are as gravitating as ever.  No surprise there. Unfortunately they can’t fully overcome a ridiculously convoluted first hour or a stale performance by Paula Patton (as GORGEOUS as she is). It’s certainly worthy of viewing if you’re bored, but both Marky Mark and Denzel have been in better movies. And I got the sense that they knew it too. FINAL GRADE: C+

We’re the Millers

This movie about a drug dealer, a stripper, a runaway, and an abandoned awkward teen forming a fake family to traffic marijuana from Mexico is just as outlandish as it sounds, for better and worse. It’s full of plot holes, completely impossible scenarios, and enough cliché moments to qualify as a romantic comedy. But above all, it is funny. And in the end, that’s all a comedy has to be to for you to enjoy yourself.  (Minus a few more points due to some of the funniest moments being shown in the trailer.) FINAL GRADE: B-

(For the record, I tried to watch Pirates of the Caribb… I mean Lone Ranger, but it was just too bad to sit through. Enjoy the Fall slate of films!)

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